Mr. K. à la barre

6:25 PM / Publié par Monsieur K. /

Sometimes, life can be a real bitch (but it's my bitch, Tatsuya Ishida would say). Sometimes, [Fun Game ! - see end of the post for more info], and of course, we blame it on God.
Either by crying "WHHYYYYYYYY ?!" on top of some lonely mountain, rain pouring everywhere, or by going to some Church, Temple, Synagogue, etc. and pray like madmen.

Well, most of us, anyway. Others decide to sue that old bearded holy bastard. Others like Senator Ernie Chambers of Nebraska. After all, why not ? He created us, and only a really sick and twisted mind could do that. He's not that innocent ! And not to forget the natural catastrophies that strike us every six month or so... Of course, Ernie (I can call you Ernie, of course ? Thanks) is not that serious, he just wants to prove the stupidity of letting anything being sued in the U.S.. Actually, I like the "Chambers style". Let's have a look to a part of the amendment he introduced to the Concealed Handgun Permit Act (globally : how many guns should a person be allowed to carry ?)

"To determine the number of pistols a licensee may lawfully carry concealed under the Concealed Handgun Permit Act or section 28-1202 on any given occasion (except the United States or the State of Nebraska shall be at war), the body weight of the licensee shall be multiplied by ten-times the licensee’s (admitted) age, then divided into the year of the licensee’s birth plus one hundred thirty-seven and one-half, then add the number of inches of licensee’s height rounded up to the next full inch which shall be subtracted from the number of the current century (2100), if the number of the current century exceeds the other number, otherwise subtract the number of the current century from the other number, then, after multiplying the size of the licensee’s right shoe by three-times the girth of the licesee’s waist after a full meal, measured and certified by a professional tailor…"

And there's plenty more of that. I told you, I like the guy. While he's at it, he should also sue the Son. We all know that his Holy iPod is full of P2P-downloaded music.

Objection !
- Eeek

Fun Game ! :I'm, do it yourself : insert deep, philosophical "motivational poster" sentence to be placed here, in a comment. The winner (probably Mr. L or Gandi, let's be honest) will win my eternal gratitude

"Now you come crying to me

But it’s too late!
The man you’re proud to be
But it’s too late!
Get your head out of the sand
But it’s too late!"
The Hives - Tick Tick Boom

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1 commentaires:

Mr. L on 1:42 AM

Just had to say: bro's before ho's.
and that was before reading the end of the post. already wished to say that. whatever. friday nights are drunk nights; that's nice. that's nice.

It is gone.

Very private joke.

Mr L.
Self-referential psychopat

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